I missed the VMAs (*yawn*) last night, but it doesn't matter because Neal Pollack covered it for me. In excruciating detail. "Carson Kressley, Kim Cattrall, Simon Cowell, and a funny cartoon baby named Stewie handicap the race amusingly but also annoyingly. 50 Cent shows up live on the Red Carpet wearing the baddest-ass pinstriped silver suit I ve ever seen. He s with Vivica A. Fox, and is definitely winning this game called life. 50 Cent, two years ago, you were recovering from nine bullet wounds, and now you re up for four awards, the host says. Oh. I feel so small and alone."
MTV's spontaneous night of crazy fun [Salon]

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