1. Michael Jackson's indictment for molesting Cancer-Boy last year is unsealed by the judge.
2. Dormsday! Advice on separating the residents of the forthcoming Avenue B dorm — keep the New Jersey Jews and the Long Island Jews apart.
3. Rock show hotspot Maxwell's offers after-show USB keychain music downloads. What will the kids think of next?
4. Martha Stewart got a half-mil bonus in 2003. Reportedly it's being delivered in loose cigarette form for easy jailhouse trading.
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