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According to THR, ABC is picking up Jennifer Love Hewitt's pilot In The Game for midseason. Despite Defamer's awkward, misguided, on-again/off-again affection for Hewitt, we saw the then-unnamed Jennifer Love Hewitt Project, and it was, how do you say it, a piece of shit. No, that's unfair. It's actually a piece of shitergy.

Hewitt plays a spunky sports reporter at (surprise, surprise) Disney-owned ESPN—did we mention that Disney owns ABC as well?—who, by the kind of happenstance that's unique to the logic of sitcom pilots, is forced on-camera. There are numerous Hewitt rack-ogling cameos by professional athletes (think Inside Schwartz without the dream sequences and with much bigger tits) and ESPN on-air personalities like the amazingly abrasive Stuart Scott. Rounding out the shitergistic fun is a joke that references ABC's Extreme Makeover, a bit of auto-handjobbery that should by itself save ABC from another failed season. Or, you know, not. By the time In The Game airs in midseason, ABC should be comfortably bent over the the sofa-arms of the other networks, accepting its fourth-place rogering with a bemused smile.

That's about all we remember. We saw the pilot a few weeks ago, and we're happy to report there was no stirring speech by Hewitt urging that Michael Eisner get to keep his job and win one for the Gipper, but there will be plenty of time to add that before midseason. Or, if things don't quite go Eisner's way, a rousing justification for an upcoming Disney regime change.