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    Target Pimps Kabbalah

    Target, the deeply up-branded ghetto superstore now located in Brooklyn, may not be what it seems. In fact, we have evidence that leads us to believe it's a massive front for cult activity.

    Yup, you guessed it: listed as a "hot buy" for only $25.99, "this red string is believed to protect against the evil eye, a negative energy source. What makes this particular piece of string so special is, in part, the fact that it has traveled to Israel, to the ancient tomb of Rachel the Matriarch, and returned, imbued with the essence of protection." Really? My friend Manny went to Israel, and all he got was some hot action on the kibbutz.
    Kabbalah Red String [Target]


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