What Would Sisto's Penis Do?

Last night, LA.comfidential conducted an impromptu investigation into the timeless "Jeremy Sisto: cut or uncut?" debate (they think "Lil Sisto" is still wearing a turtleneck) during his full-frontal performance in the play Take Me Out, but missed an important ecclesiastical implication. Long before Jim Caviezel took up the cross for two hours of Mel Gibson-administered beatings, Sisto played Jesus in the matter-of-factly titled TV movie Jesus. The Gospels clearly tell us that Jesus was circumcised in accordance with tradition. Shame on us for foolishly assuming that Sisto was a Method actor; we hope that his limited dedication to craft doesn't ultimately hurt his career.

UPDATE: Someone who apparently had better seats and/or eyesight than LA.com's reporter assures us that Sisto is indeed circumcised, but is in need of a "good ass wax." And now we need a shower.