Jack Black's Secret Jerk Off Tape? UPDATE

A confused reader just alerted us to this disturbing passage in Jack Black's Wikipedia entry:

In October 2004 Black announced on his website that he would be releasing a ten minute pornographic video (or DVD) of himself masturbating for $9.99. After several days of debate as to whether this was a joke, Black posted a thirty second clip from the video for free download on the site as confirmation of it's legitimacy.

Our cursory (read: very cursory) research into this reasonably priced, secret Jack Black self-abuse tape hasn't turned up anything yet, but we'll, er, keep plugging away until the knuckle-shuffling truth is revealed. Or until someone edits out that paragraph from the entry, perhaps forever disappointing JB fans anxious to see some, er, School of Cock action.

UPDATE: After the jump.

UPDATE: Hours of tireless research and a few friendly e-mails from Black's publicist have disabused us of the notion that any onanistic camera work exists, and that the Wikipedia submitter is having some fun at the actor's expense. ($9.99? Nothing that good ever happens to us.)

Yes, our thoughts on the truth-telling skills of celebrity publicists are well documented, but there's no good reason to be skeptical in this instance. Black doesn't even have a website (Tenacious D's notwithstanding), unless he's moonlighting in Arizona real estate, and the flack notes JB's been in New Zealand shooting King Kong since August. While we're pretty sure masturbation is legal in New Zealand, we imagine it would be exceedingly difficult to use one of Peter Jackson's expensive movie cameras to shoot this kind of DVD bonus feature for the fans.