The buzzards at The New York Post are circling above the head of Arthur Miller, speculating on the legendary playwright's health and practically calling the reaper on speed dial.

In a sort of pre-obituary sensitively headlined DEATH WATCH FOR PLAYWRIGHT MILLER, Post theater guy Michael Riedel (who probably has little love for workers' ally Miller since, according to New York he has a framed 1947 Post headline that blares "BROADWAY REDDER THAN FILM" in his Perry Street apartment) tells us:

Family and friends are gathering around the bedside of Arthur Miller, the 89-year-old giant of the American theater, who is battling cancer, pneumonia and a heart condition.

We genuinely wish Miller well and hope he bounces back. Mostly because we cannot bear the inevitable headlines that will make a grotesque pun of his most famous play's title. Brace yourselves for the tone-deaf Death of All My Sons' Crucibles. (Take that fancy-pants headline writers!)

But, hey, if our obit would feature a paragraph on our marriage to Marilyn Monroe, we'd die happy.

DEATH WATCH FOR PLAYWRIGHT MILLER [NYP]
American Masters: Arthur Miller [PBS]

Contact information for this author is not available.