Paris Hilton: Hacked

Ah, Paris, why does such misfortune seem to follow you around like a paparazzi who's been promised an exclusive flash of your cooch? After over a year of trying, Paris Hilton may finally be involved with something that lives up to her night-vision-doggystyling, amateur-porn debut into the annals of useless celebutante publicity-whoring. Someone's hacked her Sidekick, and her celeb-filled address book and some cam-phone pictures are being splashed all over the internets. By the end of the day, nearly anyone who's had the misfortune of handing over their digits to Hilton (including Fred Durst, Eminem, Christina Aguilera, Lindsay Lohan, Stephen King (!), Andy Roddick, Anna Kournikova, Vin Diesel, and the mysterious "Egplant Dike Ass"—the address book has been reproduced here) will almost certainly suffer payback for whatever they've done with her in the bathroom of the Spider Club in the form of incessant prank calls and e-mails. () How many times can one be asked if they've made a sex tape with Paris before they change their number? We're guessing about a dozen.

Photos from her Sidekick (including some choice NSFW pics of a topless Paris making out with a girl we can't identify) are after the jump.

UPDATE: "Egplant Dike Ass" revealed!

UPDATE 2: Celebrity collateral damage, starring Lindsay Lohan

Paris Hilton: Hacked
Click the picture to see a larger version of Hilton and her pals.