A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far, away...fuck it. Here's the story: Star Wars fans are lined up in front of the Chinese Theatre in anticipation of the release of Revenge of the Sith on May 19th. The problem: As of now, the movie isn't scheduled to play at the Chinese; instead, the ArcLight will host it. This small logistical matter has become a topic of much debate on the Lining Up group's website—some propose moving the line, some want to keep it where it is for the purpose of staging a more visible spectacle in the heart of Hollywood, and some want to trot out the "cancer-ridden kids" (on whose behalf the Lining Up people are collecting charitable donations) to force distributor Fox or Lucas himself to show the movie at the beloved Chinese:
Nothing personal, Darth Ekajgib [an ArcLight employee], but we are going to fight an exclusive Dome booking with every tool in our arsenal. If we have to bring cancer-ridden kids down to the line for the cameras, then we will. Um, no. But we are not above using our charity angle as ammunition. No one likes to be seen @#$% sick children on national TV.
Let it not be said that these obsessed fanboys don't have a strong grasp of how to use publicity. It would be a small matter for the people in The Line to grab one of the Michael Jackson impersonators that litter the front of the Chinese Theatre, dress him in a Fox sweatshirt, and have him fuck a sick child on national TV so that they won't have to travel four block east to watch their movie in a less desirable venue. It's just so reassuring to see that everyone's priorities are in order.
UPDATES after the jump. including a note from a Lining Up member:
UPDATE:9:15 a.m.: A Defamer operative who just drove by the Chinese tells us that there appears to be nobody waiting on line, other than the uniquitous "strange-looking guy in the Spider-Man costume." Has the line moved to the ArcLight? Did they quit for the night and haven't yet reformed the line? Developing...
UPDATE THE THIRD: A representative from Lining Up (who's on the line right now) writes in about the post by their renegade member:
Thank you for giving us a chance to respond a wild post by one of our members that has made the rounds.
Liningup.net is staying in the spot where we have great relationships with the theatre, the local businesses, and the Hollywood Division of the LAPD. We are lining up at the theatre where the first Star Wars premiered in 1977, where all of the prequels have played, where George Lucas, R2D2, Harrison Ford, and Darth Vader have their footprints in the world-famous Forecourt of the Stars .
We are raising money for an amazing charity, Starlight-Starbright Children s Foundation, that works to brighten the lives of seriously ill children. We ve only been in line for 3 days and we have already topped more than $6200 in donations, with hopefully tens of thousansds more to be raised.
Twice before we ll lined up at Grauman s Chinese Theatre without confirmation that the films would play there. Twice before, we ve been told it is going to play somewhere else. Hopefully, our luck holds out for a third time. If not, we ve still had an incredibly fun time relaxing with other Star Wars fans and raising both funds and awareness for the Starlight Starbright Children s Foundation.
43 days to go!
You heard it here: The fanboys have good intentions as well as too much time on their hands.