· If there's such a place as hell, publicist Jonathan Cheban and his alleged lover, reality twig Brittny Gastineau, will hold court from a gilded raft floating along the river Styx. [Lowdown]
· Supermodel Maggie Rizer finally files suit against her stepfather, who gambled and drank away $3.5 million of her earnings. Rizer, however, is suing for $24 million — a fine example of model mathematics. [Page Six]
· If they report on the William Morris suit against the Post, will the Daily News will be served papers, too? [R&M (2nd item)]
· Jeanette Walls takes the bait, reports that Radar reports that J.Lo is a diva when it comes to her own documentary. Follow that? [Scoop]

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