Remainders: Get Yourself Ready For a Trip Through McDonaldland

· Matt Damon: Odds-on favorite to save the chosen people [Celebrity Savior]
· You deserve to be creeped the hell out today [StayFree]
· Advertisers continue to provide a forum for the wholesale mocking of their clients [Alicublog]

Tomorrow's News

rants 1,172 5,388 The Top 1% Must Stop Insisting They’re Not Rich Right This Instant
blind items 1,132 24,810 Which Famous Lady Has a String of Gentleman Callers Visiting Her Hotel Room?
the colbert report 895 40,809 The Colbert Report Mysteriously Suspends Production
twincest 889 3,763 Could This Gay Male Twin Fuck Story Possibly Be Real?
late night 612 25,831 Jon Stewart Explains Mitt Romney’s Lack of Authenticity to David Letterman
chris brown 479 9,355 Chris Brown’s Pickup Line ‘I promise I won’t beat you!’ Is a Promise He Probably Can’t Keep
rip 460 15,507 Socialite Keels Over in the Middle of a Fashion Show in the Front Row
relationship advice 373 1,754 Times Media Reporter Brian Stelter Reveals Number-One Dating Secret
journalismism 310 14,837 Politico Mistakes State Flag for Union Flag, Idiocy Ensues
cat tats 297 15,205 Russian Man Gives His Cat the Least Creative Chest Tattoo
affairs 262 25,787 Love, Lies, and Liz Taylor: A Literary Cheating Scandal at Vogue and Vanity Fair
headlines 245 2,195 Snooki’s Getting Married (or Not)
montauk grifter 198 26,901 It Looks Like the Montauk Grifter Conned Gordon Ramsay, Too
daily show 197 12,970 Jon Stewart Examines Congress’ Insider Trading Problem
the tonight show 195 13,932 Bill Maher on Santorum’s Politics: ‘He Believes Life Begins at Erection’
reflections 175 46,670 All Apologies: I Was a Lowdown Prep School Hazer
confessions 162 129,788 Here’s Why Your Relationship is Doomed, and Other Confessions of a Therapist
montauk grifter 158 81,784 The Montauk Grifter: How One Con Man Used OkCupid for Fun, Fraud, and Profit
world news 139 14,467 Sean Penn Has Opinions; Prince William is a Pirate
explainer 123 50,150 The Non Sports Fan’s Guide to Jeremy Lin
money 109 18,375 Obama Thinks Pennies Cost Too Much to Make; Romney Wonders, “What is a Penny?"
higher learning 106 8,361 Christian College Full of Lice
health 85 57,515 Man Suffers Heart Attack While Eating ‘Triple Bypass Burger’ at Heart Attack Grill
crime 75 21,019 Brooklyn Rapper Who Tweeted About ‘Beating a Body’ Now Faces Multiple Murder Charges
church and state 74 7,494 2012 Is the Year of the Bible in PA; Previous 2,011 Years Not Years of the Bible
nyfw 67 5,465 Occupy Wall Street Plans Fashionable Fashion Week Protest