Now that she's getting married, Paris Hilton may soon find herself having to support a whole family on her meager reality television income. Hoping to parlay some of her fame into a modest bit of merchandising cash, she attempted to trademark herself last year. How did it go? According to the US Patent and Trademark Office:

"Current Status: An office action making FINAL a refusal to register the mark has been mailed."

Awww. Tragically, Ms. Hilton no longer have the exclusive right to put her name on everything from "BABY'S MULTIPLE ACTIVITY TOYS" to "INFLATABLE RIDE-ON TOYS."

On the bright side, this means my own line of bootleg "Paris Hilton toy model vehicles and related accessories sold as a unit" is still legal, thank god. Time to restock and set up a table on Canal St. -AP

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