Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'

After joining the ladies, Tom then begins his ritual couch-jumping.
Reason number 472 to avoid Star Jones: It's War of the Worlds Day on The View, which means Tom Cruise and his bearded bride-to-be are bouncing right into Barbara Walters' lap. When asked to explain his recent antics, Cruise earnestly said, "I can't restrain myself." After the jump, visual proof that this is, indeed, the case.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Not content to merely do "enough," Tom performs a second couch-jump. This will continue for 2 hours.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Tom Cruise, King of the Sectional Sofa.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Desperate to control her bouncy guest, co-host Joy Behar straps cruise to the couch.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Obligatory crotch shot.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


"Show us, Tom, what repression feels like."

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Tom demonstrates how he spends his free time when not with Katie Holmes.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Portrait of a gangbang.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Ha ha ha! Oh, har har! Tee hee! Hahahahahaha! HA HA HAR HA!

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Despite all his rage, he's still just a Cruise in a cage.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Tom assaults, audits Joy Behar.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Being an Operating Thetan feels good, doesn't it?

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


Oh, surprise! Katie Holmes is here! Jump the couch, Katie!

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


If this romance is a sham, then how come she's scratching his belly? See, this love is real.

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


"You shut your mouth, woman, or I'll hit you again."

Tom Cruise Marches His Crazy Parade to 'The View'


The horrific consumation. Time to turn off the tv.