Cuba Gooding: Club-Haunting, Stomach-Biting Leg-Humper?

We really need to get out more, because if we'd somehow made it to Chi the other night, we might have learned some smooth moves from Cuba "Chill Factor" Gooding Jr. Reports's blog:

Does Cuba Gooding Jr. need to get his jaws wired shut? A club-hopping reader tells us that the married actor bit her shoulder at Brent Bolthouse's party at Chi on Monday night. When she swung around to say "excuse me," Cuba allegedly lifted her shirt and bit her stomach. She and her group of girls yelled at him to stop, but, she claims, he began humping her leg and her backside. She tried to walk away, but he wouldn't let go until she fought fire with fire. She bit him back and yelled "I think it’s really pathetic that I just had to bite a grown man."

OK, we realize that no discussion of Gooding can end without the invoking of his Oscar-winning catchphrase: Show me the creepy, drunken stomach-chewing followed by physical contact that might constitute sexual battery if initiated by a non-famous person away from a Hollywood club! There, we feel better now.