Brett Ratner Climbs Into Bed With Robert Evans

Fresh off wedding number seven and tired of scouring Hollywood for interesting guests for his satellite radio show, "In Bed with Robert Evans," the swinging, superannuated producer is taking it easy this week, merely sloshing over to the other side of the rotating waterbed and nudging the corpulent form contentedly napping in mongrammed silk jammies and cooing, Hey, Kid Terrific, you wanna be on the radio? You bet you do. When? This week. TheRobertEvans.com makes an announcement about the "seductive, man-to-man" action to follow.

This week we will be in bed with one of our country’s master film directors who has the distinction of having his first five films (Rush Hour, Rush Hour 2, Money Talks, Family Man, and Red Dragon) grossing over one billion dollars and is currently directing X-Men 3.

It is not an interview rather a seductive man to man conversation that you can only have in the bed of the notorious Robert Evans. Is it inspiring? For anyone interested in the world of film, you’ll learn more in this hour and be inspired more than spending 4 years in film school; it’s an express train to making it big, no bullshit all fact. You’ll laugh loud and learn much. Don’t miss it, unless you’d rather go backward than jump forward…A collector’s treasure for sure, and them tuition fees? It ain’t worth it.

Rather treasure this mano y mano tough talking task of making it to the top. They did it…why shouldn’t you? Suck it all up. It will awaken you to the realization that if they did so, so can you.

It's true—virtually no 4-year film program offers you the chance to listen in on an hour of this no-bullshit master class between wizened master and hacky student in that legendary bed. Unless, of course, you're working your way through school as an escort, happen to be on call during the show, and can pretend not to be turned off by overly tanned wrinkles and After the Sunset.