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WARNING: DO NOT READ TODAY'S POST. You may be tempted by the cover story, which continues yesterday's finger-pointing at mafia spawn Victoria Gotti, who may have exaggerated her health concerns in order to gain public sympathy. But it's so not worth it. If you're sitting down and in a safe place, we'll explain:

For the front-page article, crotchety columnist Andrea Peyser went to Gotti's Long Island home to discuss whether or not Gotti had fabricated her supposed heart problems and breast cancer scare. The premise is innocent enough but, a mere three sentences into the piece, Victoria Gotti is standing topless before Peyser and forcing the columnist to feel her chest.

We're rather liberal around here, but this sort of perverse, sick shit should be illegal.

'I Knew What It Was Going to Look Like Promoting My Show. What a Coincidence!' [NYP]
Earlier: Victoria Gotti: Lies, Lies, Lies!