• When asked whether or not she and Paris Latsis were really getting married, Paris Hilton replies, "I don't know, I'm just having fun!" For once, we're certain that Paris is being completely honest. [Page Six]
• More from the VMAs in Miami: Drinking! Debauchery! Shootings! Photo Ops! Ancient History! [R&M]
• If you really want to get out of jury duty, just be 50 Cent's publicist. [Lowdown (last item)]
• It's the news you've been waiting for: On Martha Stewart's version of The Apprentice, she'll reportedly replace Donald Trump's "You're fired!" with the positively irritating, "You just don't fit in." [Page Six]
• It's a shame that former Playmate Jenny McCarthy is getting divorced; it really renders moot that $1 million deal for her book on marriage. [Scoop]

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