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A 12-step program for coming to terms with TimesSelect.

1. Awake from uneasy dreams on day two of TimesSelect; assume world's greatest, richest, most awesomest, we-can-charge-for-whatever-we-want newspaper has fixed all kinks in its big-deal new premium content system.

2. Go to and click on "Tierney: FEMA to WEMA" in an attempt to learn about John Tierney's presumed neologism, WEMA. Prepare to laugh ruefully, libertarianly.

3. Get warning screen, "To continue reading this article, you must be a subscriber to TimesSelect." Assume anticipatory pre-registration, filled out last week, simply did not go through.

4. Follow options for home subscriber to get free TimesSelect access. Enter email address and password.

5. Wait for a disconcertingly long time while system pulls up record.

6. Be told, "You already have TimesSelect. You have been identified as a Home Delivery subscriber who is currently enrolled in TimesSelect. You cannot enroll again."

7. Realize goody-two-shoes pre-registration did go through. Follow link to homepage, ready to read about WEMA.

8. Repeat steps 2 through 6.

9. Sigh.

10. Get up, walk to front door, pick up print paper from hallway.

11. Flip to A29.

12. Curse Martin Nisenholtz.

TimesSelect: Okay They Actually Do Want It to Fail
TimesSelect: It's Like They Want It to Fail