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We sampled the debut of Martha Stewart's version of The Apprentice last night, and it seems like she's a little bit unclear on the concept. After she dismissed the first hopeful with that terribly ineffectual catchphrase, "You just don't fit in," she's heard in voice-over—and then pictured—writing the unwanted candidate a letter on beautiful stationery. It's all way too toothless and civilized. On the new season of Trump's show, the castoffs are dipped in barbecue sauce and locked in the back of the limo with a dozen rabid weasels while the cameras roll. The trying-too-hard-to-be-nice Martha Stewart stops just short of naming a shade of paint after each week's loser. It's like she had all the icy bitch poncho'd out of her in prison.

Also, did anyone else notice something...monochromatic about the cast? The Crunk and Disorderly blog did, and they say it better than we ever could: "Martha Stewart does not care about black people."