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Determined to prove that they are nothing if not honorable purveyors of God-honest fluff, Us Weekly has actually enlisted the aid of Jack Trimarco and Paul Eckman, lying experts who have worked with the FBI and helped Al Qaeda interrogations. Now, they've stopped questioning terrorists for the sake of infotainment, and have instead turned their attention to stage-dad Joe Simpson and his denials of Nick and Jessica's marital problems.

Us Weekly: Winning the war on terror, one glossy page at a time!

Us Weekly