• In more PETA news, the organization has kidnapped Anna Nicole Smith's dogs and forced them to protest Iams pet food. Anna Nicole, however, thinks Iams tastes great. [AP/Yahoo]
• Details has a major scoop: Colin Farrell drinks beer! And next month, Details water as being really wet. [Hollywood Machine]
• Best name for a college sex column: Cornellingus. [The Atlantic (subscription req'd)]
• Men don't read. They also can't listen, don't understand you, and never take you anywhere nice. [BusinessWeek]
• Voice gossipette Michael Musto cannot be blamed for Gawker's sins. [NY Blade]
• Has anyone yet figured out why Manhattan smells like pancakes? Is it terror sugar? [AP/ABC]
• Project Runway reject Austin Scarlett thinks blackface is always in style. [PMc]
• Shame on Daily News staffer Bill Hutchinson for failing to note that jailed rapper Lil' Kim's lyrics channel the genius of Biggie Smalls. [NYDN]
• Depeche Mode tickets can be yours for just a little breast grope. Okay, not really a little grope — it's got to be at least 10 minutes' worth of heavy petting. [Craigslist]

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