Defamer Party Report: Jeremy Piven's Cheesy Halloween Come-Ons

A high-level Defamer operative filed this brief report on a Halloween party for Top 40 mediocrities Maroon 5 at music producer Rick Rubin's place, where Jeremy Piven proved that stale pick-up lines don't necessarily play any better on a night when half of your quarry is dressed as highly sexualized versions of nurses, various varieties of felines, and schoolgirls:

A friend and I rolled up Halloween Night to the Maroon 5 party at Rick Rubin's big ass mansion: free drinks, slutty mermaids and a few Mary Kate Olsens. Nice. Kudos to Brad and Angelina, equipped with aviator glasses and a fake Zahara strapped to her chest, (their wanna-be Aniston had the old Rachel haircut so no kudos for her). Anyhow, my friend's keen eye spotted Bruce Lee, a.k.a. Jeremy Piven, Bruce Lee amid the free drinks. Later on, Piven spotted us and gave me the world’s lamest pick up line. I laughed and walked away. He then proceeded to turn to another chick and deliver one to her. Classic. You could have been dressed as a syphilitic monster and he would have hit on you. Quelle fromage.

In the interest of keeping our operative's identity a secret, we can't reveal what the actual come-on was. Suffice it say that if Piven had referenced his costume and asked if he could "enter her dragon," it would've been an incredible improvement in both taste and imagination. At least he didn't go with "Rub me out, bitch," which he'll probably save for Entourage's next premiere party.