Thrillist Makes Things So Unfair

We're reluctant to admit it, but we've been following online newsletter Thrillist more closely than anyone without a closet full of striped button-downs ever should. And yet? We're completely transfixed by its evil, fratty brilliance. It manages, four times every week, to find a different way of promoting the finest in testosteroniffic pursuits: heavy drinking and getting ass. We may not agree with it, but we're certainly impressed. You try finding 208 different ways of telling a dude to make sure he gets his date drunk.

The female and/or gay equivalent to Thrillist is, unfortunately, Daily Candy, which focuses mostly on cute shopping, cute dining options, and cute vacation ideas. And if you're not cute, tough shit.

Being equal parts female and gay, we find this utterly reprehensible. Where's our version of these newsletters? If someone doesn't even the playing field, we'll be forced to start translating Thrillist to serve our own means: He's pouring drinks down your throat and you're getting wasted — but you've got enough sense left to know you need to get out of there. For a quick escape, here are 5 well-lit areas in the Meatpacking District...