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Sweetfaced Chris Klein, who just two posts ago was mingling among movie premiere commonfolk with a weird-looking Suzanne Somers lookalike on his arm, on the surface comes across like the world's WASPiest mensch. Not so, it would appear, as an interview with Elle has revealed Katie Holmes' ex to be nothing short of a boorish, despicable cad!

Chris, 26, a self-described "alpha heterosexual" who only dates "8 to 10's," also reveals how displeased he is if a woman he's seeing gains a few pounds.

"I'm not tolerant of that at all," declares the actor, who says he has no problem telling his swollen squeeze to shape up.

"When a woman isn't feeling good about herself and you combine that with her period, eventually she'll ask you if you like her body," he pontificates. "You have to say no."[...]

As for his romance with Holmes, Klein reveals they "had an absolute ball, but we grew up." He insists they're still friends even though they don't talk, [though] he doesn't keep up with her "amazing" Cruise coupling...

It seems the only time Klein is able to censor the running jackass commentary in his mind is when the topic of his ex's new relationship comes up; as soon as the subject is broached, as if under the influence of some mysterious, possibly threatening outside force, Klein becomes magically tight-lipped about Katie, Tom, and the little lizard V baby they have on the way. It's amazing what a few weeks handcuffed to the Reeducation Radiator, with nothing to eat but pistachio shells and one's own body hair, does for a guy's opinion of his ex's new man.