This Is Why They Haven't Caught Peter Braunstein

Oh, you saw the fiend, did you? Peter Braunstein came into your Cobble Hill coffee shop and bought a $2 cuppa joe? You even looked him in the eye? You were sure it was him, yeah? He knew that you knew, oh yes!

So, uh, why the hell did you just watch him walk away? Here's a suggestion: follow him out the door, shout and point, and CHASE THE MOTHERFUCKER DOWN! He's a journalist, for chrissakes, just some wussy writer! God presumably gave you lungs and two functioning legs; get some angry-mob action to follow him through the streets. If you catch him, we'll even buy you a new iPod or something.

Manhunt Comes Up Empty [NYDN]
Earlier: Gawker's Coverage of Peter Braunstein