Jessica Simpson Dumped by Her Publicist

Yesterday was a bad day for whorelet Jessica Simpson, as she was unceremoniously dumped by her publicist of the past two years, Brad Cafarelli. Cafarelli, who also represents Cameron Diaz and Kate Hudson, was allegedly tired of dealing with Jessica's creepily involved father, Joe Simpson — presumably, Cafarelli would rather devote his time to his clients that don't need a constant father-figure.

Interestingly, we hear Cafarelli's final straw was utter exhaustion, the sort that comes from pretending, for the benefit of the press, that Simpson's marriage to Nick Lachey isn't a total sham. Much like the rest of us, Cafarelli had had enough.

Moral of the story: When you can't even get your paid liar to lie for you, things aren't good.