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After taking a break to complete her latest work, Break, Blow, Burn, awesomely intellectual feminist and bestselling author Camille Paglia has returned to her column at to tackle the pressing issue that affects thinking women and Gays everywhere: Madonna's new album, and whether or not it's any good. Writes Paglia:

Last summer, Madonna described her forthcoming CD as "future disco" — which raised the hopes of all die-hard disco fans that "Confessions on a Dance Floor" would be a masterpiece, a return to roots but also a visionary breakthrough.

That's not what we got — though you'd never know it from the gushing reviews, which applauded the CD for achieving Madonna's purported aim of making people dance. My blood boiled at this insulting reduction of dance music to gymnastics — mere recreational aerobics. I for one do not dance to dance music; disco for me is a lofty metaphysical mode that induces contemplation.

When my partner, Alison Maddex (a true blue Madonna fan), bought the CD a few days after its release on Nov. 15, I was shocked at how the reviews had failed to note its tinny shrillness, sonic clich s, and intermittently clumsy or muddy layering — a startling lapse in Madonna's usually impeccable quality control.

Well, shit. Camille's just pissed the disco music didn't come pre-packaged with 'ludes — but beyond that, she has a point. Leave it to the academic lesbians to ruin all the fun.

Dancing as Fast as She Can [Salon]
Related: Camille Paglia's Disco Playlist [Salon]