We've received a few Media Christmas reports over the past few days, but nothing even comes close to this tale, from last night at Hiro:
Last night, at the One Modeling Agency holiday party at Hiro shit hit the fan!
During the Living Things' performance (which was awesome!), a heckler grabbed the mic from the singer and said: "I really liked you guys in the Special Olympics".... which caused the singer to bring him on stage. The drunken heckler kicked the speaker off the stage and continued his jealous charades of insults...
Then the whole band beat the living crap out of him, and a fight broke off stage as well, between security, the heckler's posse, the band and everyone in front of the stage. Even though security escorted the hipster douchebag heckler out of the club and the band managed to pull off another great song after the incident, the party was pretty much done after that. By 1:30, it was a total morgue.
I must say... it was hilarious witnessing the horror in the dumb models' (and wannabes) faces, and watching that asshole get his ass kicked.
Hilarity, indeed. And yet nothing quite so hilarious has happened yet at media parties — at least not from what we've heard. After the jump, quick reports of Voguesters inadvertently trying to attend a Mediabistro party (the horror!), middle-aged stoners at MTV, and, at the Fox News fete, a surprisingly ungay-seeming Shep Smith, a surprisingly funny Roger Ailes, and a surprising shirtless drunk dude.
Keep sending 'em in, folks — particularly when the model-style fights break out.
Tuesday, Dec. 12: "Slate's party at the Bubble Lounge in Tribeca. Sightings: Jacob Weisberg, Jim Surowiecki, Meghan O'Rourke, and even Ron Rosenbaum. I looked for Henry Blodget, but didn't see him."
Tuesday, Dec. 12: "Mediabistro at Obvia. [Ed. note: That's MB "family," as distinct from MB's staff, which had dinner last week at 'Inoteca.] The most ironic part of the party? It's literally next door to the upstairs portion of La Esquina, which meant more than one clueless Vogue/Men's Vogue staffer showed up at the wrong party by mistake — and was turned away at the door."
Friday, Dec. 9: "Nothing too scandalous to report from the Fox News Channel party at Rosy O'Grady's. The only even remotely wild thing I saw was that some producer from Greta Van Susteren's show took his shirt off and did a handstand. I have no idea why he did this, but needless to say he was quite drunk.
"The night consisted of a three hour open bar (only 6pm to 9pm... a little stingy in my opinion) and appetizers/dinner. Appetizers were strictly bar food. Jalapeno poppers, fried cheese, fried zucchini, and what seemed to be Bagel Bites. After a while, they broke out a buffet which had chicken fingers and nachos, as well as baked ziti and (oddly, considering the Jew-heavy crowd) ham.
"O'Reilly didn't even show up. Rumor has it he doesn't drink.
"I did see the uber-metrosexual Bill Hemmer holding court with several comely females. Weather bunny Janice Dean seemed to have attached herself permanently to his elbow.
"Shep Smith was there too... I kept waiting for him to do something explicitly gay, but was sorely disappointed. He just chatted calmly with some of his Fox Report producers. He's about the most laid back mofo I've ever seen. Very unassuming.
"The only other news is that Roger Ailes is apparently funny. He gave a little preamble speech, thanking everyone for a good year, etc. etc. You know, for an evil conservative mastermind he's quite personable."
Friday, Dec. 9: "The Google Xmas party was semi-low key except for the fact that DJ AM dj'd. He looked a bit forlorn, I think, or maybe that was my romantic imagination. Also, there was a gigantic Google logo ice sculpture that spit multicolored (and disgusting) shots from each of the letters. Totally gauche, in an adorable way.
"The food was eh but everyone was dressed nicely and DJ AM is surprisingly talented. Lots of dancing. Not much else to report. So far no coke-snorting bathroom-fucking rumors have been passed along."
Thursday, Dec. 8: "MTV Networks party was so huge that I'm sure nobody important showed up. If anything exciting happened there were too many half-naked, half-drunk people writhing on top of them to see it. I did, however, see an older gentleman (mid 50s? 60s?) smoking a huge joint the in balcony in plain sight. Weird. The thing about the network-wide party is the 'kids' who work at places such as on-air graphics for MTV have to put up with the TVLand accountants. Weird crowd.
"Our holiday gifts, however, were nice Lonsdale jackets. Choice of three colors (black, green or blue) and it's way better than last year's patagonia nightmare."