Update: Defamer Real Estate: Nick and Jessica's Camera And Dolly Friendly First Home

Just in case you still held a shadow of a glimmer of sparkle of a doubt in your "Nick and Jessica 4-Ever" hoping hearts that their love was truly dead, comes this tidbit buried in today's AP wires:

Divorcing couple Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey are selling their famous "Newlyweds" home, Rob Shuter, Simpson's publicist, said Monday.


The Calabasas house was featured on the hit MTV show "Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica."

The Mediterranean-style house, which includes a screening room and music studio, is being listed for $3.75 million, People magazine reported.

The asking price seems a bargain in exchange for owning what is arguably the undisputed king of all reality TV McMansions. Imagine being able to tell your friends you sleep in the very same room where Nick and Jessica pretended to not be repulsed by each other for the night vision cameras, as helpful father/career coach Joe Simpson sat crouched in the closet, pleading in hushed tones for the two to consummate their fake love, if not for him, "then for a third season pick-up!"

UPDATE: Sold! To one of the Malcolm in the Middle kids. Details after the jump.

The actor who plays the non-titular middle child on Malcolm in the Middle, Justin Berfield, has snatched up the Lachey-Simpson Newlyweds home, according to his hilariously named publicist:

Hope Diamond, Berfield's publicist, confirmed the sale Tuesday, but wouldn't disclose the price.


The 19-year-old Berfield plays the bullying middle child, Reese, on Fox's "Malcolm in the Middle."

A hearty congratulations to Berfield on his wisely spent syndication money investment. May it afford him years of luxury appointment, minus the burdens of 24-hour camera crews and blindly ambitious, fame-hungry spouses.