Those who dismiss Chester "Chet Haze" Hanks as a lightweight merely because he is the hilariously un-self-aware rapping son of Hollywood legend Tom Hanks risk making fools of themselves. Chet Haze is a theological thinker of uncommon zeal.

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Chet Haze echoes Aquinas' argument from first cause. One might reasonably refer to Chet Haze as our modern Parmenides, in that both reject the notion of creation without a prime mover.

The pneumatology of Chet Haze proceeds from the teachings of Arius.

Biblical hermeneutics come more naturally to Chet Haze than to myopic skeptics. See the writings of Hans-Georg Gadamer for further exploration of the principles set forth by Chet.

We mourn the death of Christopher Hitchens for many reasons—the strongest of which is that he escaped being eviscerated by the rhetorical razor of Chet Haze, a fate he most richly deserved.

Chet Haze's notion of nominal identity hews closely to that of Pierre Bourdieu. You can't fuck with that.