Last week, a 17-year-old boy was arrested in Topeka, Kansas, for planning to shoot twopolice officers and two administrators at his high school. That story is awful, but at least something good came from the event: a few localnews reporters introduced us to the chillest high school bro, like, ever.
Reporter: Whatexactly is going around school? What have you heard?
Chill bro: Uh, Iguess Brandon was plotting to kill some people. That’s what I heard.
Reporter: And yourreaction is?
Chill bro: Wow,man. Like, killing people is heavy.
Heavy stuff,indeed. It’s unclear how or why the news station picked this young man asan interview subject — we’re guessing he didn’t volunteer himself as tribute,because what kind of teen stoner wants to talk to a bunch of adults withcameras — but at this point, who cares? Thank you, local newspeople and chill bro, forconjuring something as hilarious as this out of an otherwise depressing story.
Sylvie Krekow is a writer in New York.