Pity Covers Are the New Pity Fucks

Friday's breakup of Lance Armstrong and Sheryl Crow didn't just emotionally destroy Allure (Crow appeared on the February cover) — it seems to have resulted in bitter heartbreak for Redbook as well. Crow is the queen of their March issue, in which she proclaims, "Lance and I were and are just happy to be together."
Oh, sweet pea. No "are." You were happy to be together. Or maybe you weren't, all things considered.

Additionally, Jim Hanas notes that Crow's cover is an interesting twist to the Redbook curse:

Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards graced the February [2005] cover, then promptly hit the rocks. Since then, cover subjects Nick and Jessica (March 2004), Jennifer Aniston (June 2003), and Heather Locklear (October 2001 and July 2005) have all taken up residence in Splitsville. Hilary Swank (March 2005) has also been pricing real estate there.

Kudos to Lance and Sheryl, then, for beating the curse and destroying love on their own terms.

Curses. Again. [Encyclopedia Hanasiana]
Earlier: Sheryl Crow and Lance Armstrong Hurt 'Allure'