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In this inclement weather edition of the Stalk: Liev and Naomi, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard, Mary Louise Parker and Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Joaquin Phoenix and Eva Mendez, a Clinton family trifecta, Gwyneth Paltrow, Lucy Liu, Drew Barrymore and her Stroke, Ed Norton, Sam Waterston, John Waters, Muhammad Ali, Kim Gordon, Julianna Margulies, Cate Blanchett, Terry Richardson, Spike Lee, Mandy Moore, Susan Sarandon, Kristen Davis, Annabella Sciorra & Federico Castelluccio, Mel Brooks, Mike Myers, Ed Bradley, and Vanessa Minnillo.

Hope it's not too late! Last Wednesday (2/22) my boyfriend and I spotted Liev Schreiber at the Noho Star on Lafayette and Bleecker. He was looking quite comfy in his heather sweater and unshaven-ness, and sat in a corner table by the window very inconspicuously. With some older gentleman who looked like a theater (theatre) director-type. Perhaps if I were more savvy in that arena I would have recognized him. Alas. Anyhow, he ordered a tall midori-sour-looking cocktail, and his friend had red wine. I dunno if the waitresses even knew who he was; they were very slow in paying attention to them. But Liev didn't seem to notice. He's very tall. Not that the two are related.

Lots of pretty people at the opening of "Hedda Gabler" at BAM last night [2/28] — in addition to stars Cate Blanchett and a heavily bewhiskered Hugo Weaving. Liev Schreiber towered over tiny Naomi Watts (despite her 4" heels) — they were very much together, and had Liev's brother Pablo Schreiber as their head groupie. Goodness, he's even taller than Liev. Saw them all chatting with BAM alumna Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard at intermission. Was shocked to see Mary Louise Parker talking to a fey, well-styled man with wispy limbs and an oversized head by the bar: Had she reconciled with Billy Crudup??? No, it was just Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Is he gay? He's gotta be. My gaydar was off the charts as he strutted around the party after the show, seemingly looking to solicit compliments. Few of the BAM sophisticates took the bait, but the many photographers were more than happy to shoot frame after frame as he pouted those Lisa Rinna lips. He seemed a little coked up.

While waiting for our table at La Esquina I saw Eva Mendez heading for the bathroom with a greasy man trailing behind her. First thought was, "what's she doing with this greaseball Quickly realized said greaseball was Joaquin Phoenix, and he mysteriously went from greasy to really hot. He appeared to be either very nervous or extremely coked up; also, he was short.

Monday 2/27: A Clinton Trifecta: Bill and Hillary along w/ 20+ of Chelsea's friends were celebrating Chelsea's 26th birthday in the back room of Lupa. Topics of conversation included AIDS in Africa, Bill's recent trip to Pakistan for a 25 million dollar wedding, and the C-section birth of Chelsea. When Chelsea blew out the candles on her cake, her hair caught on fire. Randomly, Gwyneth Paltrow was there, too. While trying to maneuver her big belly out of the crowded restaurant, she spilled water on my friend's jacket. She was very sweet though and looked absolutely stunning. She was not there for Chelsea's party.

Saw Lucy Liu, Fab, and Drew Barrymore downstairs at Bond Street Saturday night. Fab crashed into me, then I crashed into the cheap dividers and he proceeded to apologize profusely. Lucy looked adorable clear skin and great hair. Drew had on a wrap dress of sorts matched with a French twist sorta thing. Surprisingly conservative.

Saturday must have been my lucky day, because I was walking west on tenth street between second and third and saw Ed Norton in the midst of a photo shoot. It was just a couple of people with him, and they were clearly trying to play it cool he turned away and tried to look casual as I walked by but you can't fool me, Ed! After that I headed over to Whole Foods at 24th and 7th to do some shopping and saw Sam Waterston (of never-ending Law and Order fame). He's super tall and was wearing a Crocodile Dundee-type hat that just about doubled his height. Unlike Mr. Fight Club, he clearly wants to be noticed.

I saw John Waters yesterday at the opening at PS1 yesterday. He butted ahead of me to get a better view of one of The Thirteen: Chinese video now installations. Figures. Lankier than I imagined and attired in a more LL Bean than urban trouper kind of way.

Yesterday while I was waiting at the gate in Laguardia, I saw former Heavyweight Champion of the World Muhammad Ali walking through the terminal with the assistance of his walker.

Saw Kim Gordon Saturday night in line to get into the opening of the Tony Oursler show at Nye Haus. Everyone was waiting in line to get into the elevator to go up to the gallery. When she realized that she had to—GASP—wait like a normal person, she left. This is especially funny because she was featured in some of the video art in the gallery. But she had an amazing white Marc Jacobs bag and was wearing really cute black sparkly shoes.

Julianna Margulies outside the American Airlines Theater last Saturday, having a smoke pre-Pajama Game matinee. Very attractive, though her complexion made her appear older in person than onscreen. Suddenly conscious of having been sighted by the general population, she quickly butted out and went into an adjacent shop to purchase an iced beverage to tuck into her knee-high Uggs. I long for her even moreso now that rumor has it she's earned a character arc within the upcoming Sopranos season.

The boyfriend and I saw Cate Blanchett and her husband pushing baby in carriage up Sterling Place in Park Slope. She was tall, tall, tall, with seriously projectile cheekbones, supernaturally golden hair, wearing a yellow and brown tweed coat, Prada-ish, and a scarf wrapped up high around her neck. She looked throwaway chic, like a luminous celebrity being fronting as a Park Slope stroller mom. I am so going to see her in Hedda Gabler.

Went to the Yeah Yeah Yeah's show at Bowery on Saturday 2/25. Oy vey. A very bloated James Iha stood in front of me with his entourage of black-haired Lolitas the whole time. Slimy photog Terry Richardson was there looking Viced/American Appareled-out, but I suppose that the godfather of moustache-rebirth should be allowed to wear his lip roach sans snarky remarks from the peanut gallery. Wait. No he shouldn't. A diamond in the rough was Kim Gordon, who was with a Strokes-coiffed gent that wasn't Thurston (another member of Sonic Youth perhaps?) Also, I had a lovely conversation with Nick Zinner's father in the coatcheck line. Zinner senior swelled with pride over his son, "a sweet boy," and serenaded us with "The Ladies Who Lunch." Priceless.

Saw Spike Lee getting out of a silver super-high-end boxy Mercedes SUV yesterday on 22nd St between 5th & 6th. He was wearing a really bright and puffy white jacket. He walked into an unmarked building.

I saw Mandy Moore last week in the village. Her hair was dyed black (maybe she is playing a ghoul in a new movie) and she was having trouble walking. A female friend was trying to prop her up. It was only 5:00PM but obviously Ms. Moore had a liquid lunch. The funny thing is Mandy lost a show when she stumbled and looked embarrassed. Still, no one paid any attention to her. They just thought it was some drunk, and not the chick that dated the famous tennis star. I thought this was funny.

Stood next to a still-hot-for-my-age-looking Susan Sarandon in the Apple Store. She was with her son (or who I believe was her son), shopping for an iPod case. I was crouching down looking at one case when I heard THAT voice, and I looked up, and sure 'nuff, it was her. A few minutes later I ended up on line next to her.

Just now, on W. 26th Street, as I walked to 8th Ave for my much-needed
afternoon Starbucks run, I overheard a familiar chipper, feminine voice reassuring a friend. I looked towards the street to see Kristin Davis, in oversized black sunglasses and a dark tweed (?) coat. Her skin was radiant (contractual Maybelline requirement?), and she looked amazingly put together with lustrous hair. I think I'd recognize her voice anywhere. Smiling, she was reassuring her nondescript blond friend as they walked towards a waiting limo. Coming from the Martha Stewart show, perhaps?

Having just finished watching all 5 seasons of the Sopranos in the last 2 months, I was a bit starstruck when I saw Annabella Sciorra & Federico Castelluccio at the Tats Cru Gallery opening on Fri, 2/24.

Saw Mel Brooks around 1:30 today at Magno Sound building on 7th at top of Times Square. Looks the same in person. Was with a younger man who appeared to be his son. He noticed that I noticed him but did not bring myself to gush. Restrained myself from doing the, "Did You Ever Hear the German Band?" tune by the Spikey helmeted guy auditioning for "Springtime for Hitler" in the original, "The Producers."

Saw Mike Myers Saturday afternoon at Inoteca in the LES. He walked in wearing a red hockey jersey, carrying a hockey stick, and began chatting cheerfully with a table of three young pretty girls before heading to the bar in the back. I've seen him around town a few times.

I was at the George Clinton & The P-Funk All-Stars show last night (2/28) at BB King's and sat about 3 tables away from Ed Bradley and a woman who I assumed was his wife. He was at a reserved table and spent most of the show watching the band like he was observing them for a story. He did get into the music and clap along for a few songs, and he even sang along during the "Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On" closing medley. He and his wife got up and left by the back door as the show was ending, before the lights came up.

I saw Vanessa Minnillo at Marquee she is really pretty and was wearing jeans and a cute top.