Things to learn from the laptop stabbing

The SF Chron's laptop stabbing piece is today's most educational article, full of life lessons:

¬ New York is now safer than San Fran, according to friends of investment bankers.
¬ Suspects are teens, which is probably why PCs get stolen more than those lousy-for-games Macs.
¬ You can buy the stolen notebooks in U.N. Plaza.
¬ If cops stake out a cafe, they must buy lattes. (Seriously, that seems to be the logic used around the last paragraph.)
¬ San Jose is, as usual, less exciting than San Fran, with laptop thefts but no robberies.
¬ Ice-T ain't the only bad boy who always cruises with a piece in his lap.
¬ Chron writer Jaxon Van Derbeken can't turn down a good "hot spots" pun.

Laptop thieves descend upon wireless cafes [SF Chronicle]
Earlier: "Thank God, I was afraid he was pitching me a startup [Valleywag]