Without much comment, we present a press release specially selected — chosen, if you will — for this Hebraically significant day. Herewith, a new argument for why we lean to the left each time we drink a glass of wine:
From: Brian McDermott
Sent: Tuesday, April 11, 2006 5:00 PM
To: [tipster redacted]
Subject: New Holiday: Gassover
Those big family Seders and stacks of matzo we enjoy at Passover have an unspoken dark side-one that's among society's last taboos: the flatulence that results from gastrointestinal distress.
Instead of reflecting on the Jewish people's exodus from Egypt, we end up struggling to contain the exodus of gas.
Dayeinu? Indeed. But, alas, this plague continues...
Flatulence, irritable bowels, heartburn, indigestion, and growling guts are common Passover conditions that can be treated without polluting our bodies with antacids and other over-the-counter drugs that, for many people, don't even work.
Interview Bill Downs, one of the world's foremost experts on diet and digestion, and find out how Jewish families can avoid Passover eating hazards —especially certain holiday foods and treats that have seriously adverse effects on dieters and diabetics.
Bill can provide a wealth of suggestions that will help families keep their taste buds and their digestive systems happy and healthy during (and after!) their big Passover Seder. Downs has over 20 years ofexpertise in diet, digestion, nutrition science, and biological chemistry.
He's also published several peer-reviewed studies, and is the author of the Trafon blog (Trafon.org), the first blog to tackle the last taboo: serious, open discussion about why we 'fart', and the root causes of digestive disorders, gastrointestinal diseases, and what people can do about it.
Downs can also discuss:
* The common ingredient in sugar-free chocolates, candies, drinks, and foods that plagues diabetics and dieters with severe gas, cramping, and diarrhea
* What Passover foods are most likely to cause indigestion, and why
* Why people tend to get gassy around major holidays
* What's the best way to tell someone they have offensive gas
* How to survive holiday feasts without over-stressing your digestive system
* The biochemical processes that cause indigestion
* How to control indigestion over the long-term
* What causes flatulence (farting)
* Why farts are funny to everyone except the person suffering with them
* Why some foods cause GI distress in some people, but not all people
To arrange an interview with Bill, call Jackie Zima at 610-642-XXXX, or write to xxxx@GregoryFCA.com.
Thank you for your consideration!
27 W. Athens Ave., Suite 200
Ardmore, Pa. 19003
610/642-XXXX (p); 610/642-XXXX (f)