Wilmer Valderrama's Donkey Punch Connection: UPDATE

By way of follow-up to yesterday's fundamentally inaccurate, wholly disturbing "Donkey Punch" blind item in Page Six, a helpful reader supplied us with this fun fact about Hollywood's most self-celebrated, C-list cocksman:

As anyone who has worked on the [CBS] Radford lot might know, Wilmer Valderrama's parking space name plate was "Donkey Punch." If you're going to beat your girlfriend in the head while "at the peak of your passionate lovemaking," you might as well advertise to your co-stars, the writing staff, and the lot's security department.

While we certainly wouldn't accuse Valderrama of being involved in a DonkeyPunchGate, this revelation will at the very least make us reevaluate our former belief (based on his reputation as a leading devirginizer of local starlets) that he must be an exceptionally gentle lover. It's always painful to lose one's illusions, isn't it?

UPDATE: We are ashamed to admit a failure in Donkey Punch intel, as a couple of readers have pointed out that it was Danny Masterson, not That 70s Show pal Valderrama, who had the nameplate. (It's also his DJ name, apparently.) We regret the error and encourage you to adjust your opinions of both actors' sex lives accordingly.