The online stalkerazzi at TMZ.com knew that if they shot enough video of people stumbling into and out of Hollywood clubs, eventually they'd hit the jackpot. And last night they did, capturing three-and-a-half minutes of oil heir/committed scenester/drunken jackass Brandon Davis throwing shitfaced napalm on the Paris Hilton-Linsday Lohan conflagration by loudly and repeatedly addressing the burning Lohan carpet/drape-matching question (which we hadn't realized was a controversy until now) as a giggling Hilton egged him on. With the zeal of a teenage Klan inductee at the moment he realizes it's OK to drop the n-bomb at his first hate-in, Davis reveals a weird prejudice against redheads by derisively declaring Lohan a "firecrotch" over and over again, occasionally stumbling into spittle-flecked inspiration like "Lindsay Lohan is a firecrotch, she has freckles coming out of her vagina, and her clitoris is seven feet long." That run arrives at the tail-end of the footage, right before the part where you start thinking that taking a shower in hot bleach to atone for watching the entire video might be a good idea. But if you watch only one video of an asshole Mischa Barton ex-boyfriend saying unflattering things about Lindsay Lohan's ladyparts today, make it this one.