ConFonz put it in words, here it is in pictures: Sun's JavaOne conference fills the Moscone Center with beanbag chairs, applet hounds, and mobile developers. Paul Boutin provides photos by Patrick McGovern.

Geek out: Two Minutes Hate at JavaOne 2006


Paul Boutin puts it best: "Quick, someone throw a MacBook through the screen!"

Geek out: Two Minutes Hate at JavaOne 2006


Splunk booth hunk Vito. That's his name. No joke needed here.

Geek out: Two Minutes Hate at JavaOne 2006


An assistant holds Scott McNealy's official "Not the CEO!" buck-passing sign.

After the jump, much ado about coiffing.

Geek out: Two Minutes Hate at JavaOne 2006


"Look, all I know is that I came to this studio stoned, and I'm seeing all these M&M's that I cannot eat!"

Geek out: Two Minutes Hate at JavaOne 2006


"Oh yeah? Well — well — Jon Schwartz's ponytail is TEN times cooler than yours!"

Geek out: Two Minutes Hate at JavaOne 2006


Splunk's Christina Noren is about to sic Vito on this man's hair.

Geek out: Two Minutes Hate at JavaOne 2006


"Mumble mumble mumble Google chefs mumble mumble getting all the girls mumble spotlight-grabbing food hacks mumble..."