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Spotted prancing around inside the gates of the U.S. Department of Homeland Security and Coast Guard building, the turkey pictured at right is part of the government's latest effort to multitask, fighting terrorism while getting a jump on holiday meal plans. Besides being rather tasty, this ever-vigilant bird has pledged to keep our fair island safe from tender greens, assorted nuts, small bugs, and spiders.

Turkey Patrols Grounds Like He Freakin Owns the Place [Curbed]