Gossip Roundup: Lisa Turtle Missed the Drug Awareness Episode

• The National Enquirer finds itself getting sued, yet again — but this time it's not Tom Cruise unleashing the lawyers. It's little Lisa Turtle (aka Lark Voorhies), who is suing for unspecified damages after the rag quoted a source as saying she was bipolar and addicted to cocaine. Honestly, she did look a little tweaked when she and Screech did "the sprain" dance. [TMZ]
• Britney Spears suspects hubby K-Fed may be the source of leaks to the tabloids. He may not be the best husband for her, but Federline sure is loyal to America. [Scoop]
• Shiloh Jolie-Pitt's grandfather, Jon Voight, launches a public campaign to see the new baby. Considering his contact with the press was a major reason behind his estrangement with Angelina Jolie, this strikes one as a not-so-good plan. [Lowdown]
Three Days of Rain may not have been stellar, but was it really so bad as to kick Julia Roberts down to the new face of Avon? [Page Six]
• Nobody's quite sure whether or not Anna Nicole Smith is pregnant, particularly because she's yet to figure out how to pee on a stick. [R&M]
Details gives a rundown of the city's most hump-friendly public restrooms; the Plumm, Bungalow 8, and Bar 89 make the list. And yet there's no mention of the bathrooms at the Christopher Street Pier. C'mon, Details. We know you know. [Page Six]