There's something refreshing about a celebrity who can quickly recognize, accept, then proudly claim their rigidly fated, D-list status. Take for example Kristin Cavallari, who has parlayed a stint on MTV's Laguna Beach, playing nothing more than a loosely scripted version of her spoiled, horny self, into a full-time career packed with all kinds of exciting opportunities to pick up Jessica Simpson's sloppy seconds:
JESSICA Simpson can breathe easier. Producers of the prequel to "The Dukes of Hazzard" decided against having Simpson back as a younger version of Daisy Duke. Instead, they were considering younger, equally blond Kristin Cavallari of "Laguna Beach." But Simpson dislikes Cavallari because she hooked up with Simpson's ex, Nick Lachey, several months ago. Critical comparisons would have been painful. But now Maxim model and "Deal or No Deal" showgirl April Scott has been cast in the role. Sadly for Scott, it's a straight-to-DVD release.
While Page Six claims Simpson can now "breathe easier," we wouldn't be surprised if she wasn't a tad disappointed by the news, seeing as she will now be forever deprived of the pleasure of freeze-framing her personal copy of Hazzard 2 on the most unflattering, cellulite-friendly shots of Daisy Jr. in her short shorts, whilst gleefully bandying about the phrase "inferior sequel in every way."
- HEARS FOOTSTEPS [NY Post]