Larry Ellison released a messenger falcon from his castle turrets to officially announce why he stiffed Harvard for a promised $115 million donation. Without Harvard prez Larry Summers on board, Ellison's minions said, he just didn't feel the gift was right.
Summers, of course, was pushed out of Harvard after he implied that girls aren't good at math and science.
"It's official," said Oracle spokesman Bob Wynne. "The reason is the relationship he had with Larry Summers who leaves this week. Larry Summers was the brainchild of this whole concept. With his departure, Larry reconsidered his decision."
Disregarding Mr. Wynne's word choice (surely brainchild is not the word he wants), this would make a fine excuse. Except that Ellison didn't bother mentioning his change of heart when Summers resigned in March, instead waiting until last week's media frenzy forced his hand.
Hey, when Larry Ellison is running late, time had better slow the hell down.