Remainders: Shannen Doherty Will Save You

• Just when you thought The View situation couldn't get any more chaotic, Shannen Doherty enters the fray. God, we hope Brenda shows up drunk. [NYP]
• We have no idea what Lindsay Lohan's problem is — other than the paparazzi in her face — but her language is unacceptable. Did she learn this from Brandon Davis? [TMZ]
• Da Hip Hop Rascalz are bunch of East Harlem schoolkids who are far more talented than you'll ever be. Or at least far more cute. [WFMU]
Absurdistan author Gary Shteyngart endures Krucoff. [92Y]
• Express, that temple of fashion, sells a LES t-shirt for $22.50 — but reads, "Essex between Rivington and Clinton." And the entire neighborhood spontaneously bursts into flames. [Curbed]
• Gay Talese talks to The Morning News. And talks. And talks. But not necessarily in a bad way. [TMN]
• Who doesn't hate AOL? [Consumerist]
• If you want a talking head to pull all the graphic details out of a sexually molested prisoner, then Nancy Grace is your gal. [TV Newser]