Cosmo Editor Will Teach You To Raise Temperature Of Useless Area Around Men's Penis, Testicles

Via Eat The Press we found this excerpt from Cosmo EIC Kate White's new contribution to literature, How to Set His Thighs on Fire: 86 Red-Hot Lessons on Love, Life, Men, and (Especially) Sex. It's pretty much what you'd expect: Kate thinks confidence is sexy, Kate thinks sexiness comes from attitude, Kate uses the word "sex," "sexy," or "sexiness" at least once per sentence. But what really set our own thighs on fire (well, it was this or the eczema) was the following bit. Read it slowly. Savor it. See if you know where it leads.

Remember Omarosa from The Apprentice? She was considered the evil one, of course, the conniving bitch, but I met her when I did a segment on the first Apprentice and I found her intriguing. After the show was over, I invited her to my house for dinner. One of the things that struck me about her was that she really believed in her own sexiness. She wasn't waiting around for someone to tell her. And because of this, she could light up a room. My dog, a little Westie, leapt into her arms when she arrived and then sat in her lap for the rest of the night. I have never, ever seen him act like that with anyone else. As far as he was concerned, she was on fire.

For those of you as aroused as we were, we're gonna have to play spoiler and tell you there's no need to click through: Omarosa doesn't fuck the dog.

Excerpt: 'How to Set His Thighs on Fire' [ABC]