It's time to share your collective blind item wisdom with the world. But before going on to your guesses, get drunk and call One Overly Caring Blind Vice, hoping to rekindle your long-dead romance:
Ted sez: "We all know bod-goons are paid to protect the overly watched frames of the celebs who employ them. Most times, these bossy gorillas are très busy trying to keep pesky paps away or simply shooing starstruck autograph seekers. Occasionally, these walking barricades even help carry celebs' purses or pups. Too cute! Not this, though: The security staff utilized by one Morgan Mayhem (a repeat offender in the naughty narrative known as the Blind Vice archive) is far more, uh, hands-on. See, Morg's men protect way more than her bitchin' bod. They also keep more than a hawklike eye on her damn drug stash." Read the item.
You say: Your guesses are after the jump.
You also say: This is the part where we'd list the names of others who received some support so as to divide potential legal sniper fire, but there weren't any. So we'll just say that we think you're way, way off about Lohan, who has never touched a drug harder than DayQuil, and then only after diluting it with a gallon of water.
And The Andy Dick/Dakota Fanning Memorial "You Also Say" Item Goes To: Recently deceased Hollywood treasure June Allyson. You should be ashamed of yourselves for suggesting this even in jest, sickies.