The View producers announce that they will not search for an official replacement for Star Jones until after September 5, once Rosie O'Donnell plops down on her chair. Meanwhile, O'Donnell is blogging in favor of American Idol finalist Kellie Pickler, who co-hosted yesterday. Yeah, she's real pretty, isn't she, Rosie? [Lowdown (2nd item)]
• Paris Hilton taunts Lindsay Lohan with unsubtle snickering; Lohan manages not to go apeshit. Such remarkable restraint can only mean that Lohan actually took a day off from the marching powder. [Page Six]
• Diana Bianchi, the 19-year-old mistress of Peter Cook (estranged husband to aging supermodel Christie Brinkley), never asked Cook to leave Brinkley for her. She was happy with quiet, complacent fucking. [TMZ]
• And of course, this is not the first time Cook has dipped his toes in the barely legal pool. [Fox 411]
• Oliver Stone likes hallucinogenic drugs. Big surprise there — we all saw Alexander, unfortunately. [R&M]
• After alleging that her ex-fiancee, Sopranos star Vincent "Big Pussy" Pastore, beat the crap out of her, Lisa Regina held a reading for her book on domestic violence and invited the entire Sopranos cast. Alas, no one showed, lest they too get a gear shift in the face. [Page Six]