Please put down your pencils and turn in your bluebooks; if you don't know the answer to this week's Blind Item Guessing Game, no hastily scrawled, last-minute guess can save you. But before we get to your responses, indulge in another quickie with One Quelle Surprise Blind Vice:
Ted sez: "More fun, in my jaded book, would be Plumper Dumper's newfound cojones. But let me, uh, back up first, 'kay? Mr. Dumper, also a man known more for his male-on-male activities than his female goings-on, flabbergasted more than a few of us fruits when he married Bertha Broom-Rider. Suddenly, P.D. attempted to be more discreet in his fraternizing 'n' fellah-collecting—activities he did not curb once he walked down the aisle with B.B.R. Though few expected him to, 'course." Read the item.
You say: Your guesses are after the jump:
You say: Perhaps unduly influenced by our completely coincidental posting of the Guessing Game immediately after an item about Star Jones' possibly divorce-seeking gay husband, you identified the blind item's privately uncloseted homosexual as Big Gay Al Reynolds, the suspiciously effeminate paramour of the aforementioned ex-View host. We, of course, are shocked—shocked!—that you would leap to such nearly unanimous conclusions about the gay love of Star's life.
You also say: Just for variety, some of you guessed the duos of Carmen Electra/Dave Navarro and Sarah Jessica Parker/Matthew Broderick.
And The Andy Dick/Dakota Fanning Memorial "You Also Say" Item Goes To: The late Mickey Spillane and the late Red Buttons. Really, people, must you trod upon fresh graves in this manner?