Lick Jared Kushner's Envelopes

Getting sweaty about your crush on The Kush but not sure how to make your dreams come true? Mediabistro may have the answer:

Want to be a player in the advertising field at Manhattan's hippest and smartest newspaper? The New York Observer has an exciting full-time entry level position reporting directly to our publisher and playing an integral role in supporting the advertising sales team of the newspaper.

Sure, the job's as an administrative assistant, but you're reporting directly to the publisher. And don't forget, this is a man who works 20-hour days. Surely, late one night as you both frantically try to make sense of the latest Gurley transcript his fingers will brush against yours and...

Whew. We're a little sweaty ourselves. Hurry up and apply, kids, we bet this one goes quickly.

Administrative Assistant [Mediabistro]