Canada Having Rapturous Hate Affair With Jessica Alba

We have to hand it to Jessica Alba: It's a good plan. When in your natural habitat, play up a humble, sweet-natured image. Bemoan your status as a sex symbol movie star forever struggling to break free from the burden of almost supernaturally hot looks. Show some versatility, and at the same time poke fun at your image by hosting an irreverent cable awards show. Then, go up to Canada a couple times a year to unleash the raging bitch from hell you've been bottling up for months on some of their irritatingly "nice" locals. Jaunted.com summarizes Vancourverites' general feelings about the star, in town shooting Good Luck Chuck with Dane Cook:

Jessica Alba can't even shop on the company dime without being rude to people. She just strides up and down Robson Street leaving a trail of murderous Canucks in her path. She might want to take a few pointers from Rachel McAdams, who's keeping busy at work - she might not get out much, but across the board people think she's lovely—she is also Canadien so that helps.

Canadian site LaineyGossip.com has also documented similar tales of Albazilla and her Four Assistants of The Apocalypse rampaging through the city with seemingly nothing better to do than terrorize the locals with her imported brand of Hollywood bitchery, which not even an airborne lightning strike could stop.