BREAKING: Shake Shack Burgers NOT Full of Doody

We just received the following letter from Danny Meyer's Union Square Hospitality Group in reference to the news about Shake Shack. After the jump, Meyer, generally considered one of the nicest guys in the New York restaurant industry (a distinction essentially earned by not yelling any of the thousands of Spanish-language slurs for "homosexual" at back of the house staff), explains the recent poor inspection.

As you may have heard, Shake Shack performed poorly when it was inspected by the Health Department on July 25, 2006. There is no excuse for these results, and we have already addressed every point aggressively with the goal of getting an "A" on our re-inspection. The facts are not nearly as bleak as what you may have read or heard.

Operating a small, stand-alone establishment in a park is both a privilege and a challenge; we work hard every day to provide the cleanest possible environment for our guests, as well as the safest and most comfortable workplace for our employees. The major violations for which we were cited were either structural or operational. None found conditions of vermin, mucus, urine or feces.

There you have it. (Emphasis Meyer's.) We wish he would have also addressed the rumors that the hot garlic potato chips at Union Square Café are actually made from the flesh of deceased former regular USC Roger Strauss, as called for in Strauss' will, but maybe next time. We once again feel confident that the shakes at the Shack have no more urine than is usually found in such products.

Earlier: Shake Shack Only 2nd Dirtiest Restaurant in NYC